Friday, February 21, 2014
100 Word Challenge: Steven
One day, a magic, scary, crazy house fly to the earth. And a ghost put a white lighting ball on the ground that under the magic, scary, crazy house. It let the tree has red fire, and let rock lighting. The ugly king of ghost call every ghosts come to the white lighting ball, and the white lighting ball is the enter of the magic, scary, crazy house. When all the ghosts are in the house, a ugly ghost king come out and a party is start. They eat people and animals, and drink blood. And the house fly away.
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I like your opening sentence Steven, where you used 2 adjectives together to build the excitement. You had some good ideas, especially repeating the 3 adjectives later on in the writing. I wonder if next time, you could read it through and check some word endings e.g. a party is start.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good writing!
Nicola Richardson, 100wc team, Tyne and Wear, UK
I'am sorry, I can't speak many English because I from china.
DeleteSteven