Wednesday, February 5, 2014
100 Word Challenge: Emma
I walk with my friend to the water's edge. We sit in the waves sweeping back-in-forth through the sand.I fell something tug at my feet and My face flies under water. I tug at the thing holding my ankles. It feels slimy. Fifteen seconds, thirty seconds, I feel my breath slipping away and finally the thing that was holding me gave out. I gasp for air but all I have is the seaweed in my hand. We look around but all we could see was water. I wake up startled. “It was just a dream” I sigh and fall into a deep peaceful sleep.
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Wow! you had me quite scared there, and i love the description and the: it was only a dream!
ReplyDeleteThanks Emma- as with the previous comment - I was gripped.You have used early short sentences effectively to build tension - I also like the way you keep the identity of the 'thing' hidden. Take care with endings with 'dreams' can be overused- would a question work better?
ReplyDeleteMr Furlong team 100-Norwich